Jolie Shapiro00:01.462
Hey y'all, welcome to Revenue Mind, a podcast where revenue leaders talk all things mental health. I'm your host and with us is Jamal. Welcome Jamal.
Jamal Hamilton00:10.062
Awesome. Thank you so much for the invite, Joey. It's super timely and super appreciative. So yeah, it's great to be here.
Jolie Shapiro00:19.884
Yeah, yeah, of course. Super, super happy to have you. Loving all of your newsletter and all of your post-femental health. So wanted to reach out to a rising star. This isn't just for executives per my message. Cool. So yeah, so I don't prep a lot of people for this, or actually I don't prep anyone for this question. What makes you you?
Jamal Hamilton00:35.854
Yeah. Man, that is such a profound question. It sounds simple, but I guess it's so layered and... I think what makes me me is just my ability to be extremely empathetic to other people. And just in terms of just being a freaking human, I think that is kind of what makes me me and just being able to just build genuine relationships with other people. And I know that sounds like super cliche, right? Everybody, you would probably go on LinkedIn and just randomly pick somebody and they'll say, yeah, I've, built that building relationships, right? But I think it, it goes deeper than that, right? It's, there's one thing in terms of building a relationship, but there's also, you know, building trust. There's also, you know, having, you know, open lines of communication and just showing up as yourself, you know, fully and authentically and not shying away from that. Because I think for a long time, you know, I shied away from certain aspects of myself because I didn't want to be seen that way or I didn't see myself that way. You know, I didn't see myself as this beacon of light and someone who's extremely vulnerable and someone other people can relate to or turn to in times of stress or in times of uncertainty. I hope that answered your question. Yeah, think that's just who I am as a mature. My core is just being kind, supportive, loving. I'm always someone that's gonna put out positive energy into the world because I... always want to get that type of energy back. Yeah, life's too short, man. Life's too short to be a douchebag for for like, what better term, you know, life's too short to just treat people bad or always be in a bad mood. So like, that's why I always try to bring my full self to every conversation, every interaction that I have with someone, because you never know. You never know what that could do for that person, but you also never know what that could do for yourself in the same breath. So, yeah, that's what makes me me, I guess.
Jolie Shapiro03:30.774
That's one of the most authentic answers I've heard so far. So thank you. One second, I'm just gonna pause this, because I don't have my echo cancellation on. Nope, it's not letting me. No, you're canceled. I'm not, but I also have my microphone right here, so I should be okay. shit, did I pause you? Are you there?
Jamal Hamilton03:38.23
I didn't know if I needed echo cancellation. No, no, no, I'm just, I'm really good at pausing.
Jolie Shapiro03:59.161
was like, my god, your face! was like, wait, did he die? Like, what just happened? my god, that was really funny. You literally looked frozen, like the fucking Tin Man.
Jamal Hamilton04:01.614
You That's actually weird. That's one of my, that's actually one of my hidden talents is I'm able to perfectly freeze myself.
Jolie Shapiro04:16.448
Damn! my god, that might be a clip.
Jamal Hamilton04:23.329
Like my partner tells me that all the time like we'll we'll be doing something or having a conversation about something and I'll like I'll just I'll do that like I'll do she'll be like Are you okay? Did I say something wrong? Like that Finn you or you upset and I'm just like, oh no, I'm just I'm in here. I you know, I mean like I'm such an internal person so like a lot of times I like retreat to my brain and on the outside it just looks like I'm just like rather than basically, but I'm just thinking, processing.
Jolie Shapiro04:57.365
Wow, yeah, that's a talent. Damn. I was like, whoa, what is happening? Okay, so I was trying to pause it to do the echo cancellation, figure that out. I'll just start over. Yeah, so that's one of the most authentic answers I think I've heard on this podcast. So thank you. I know we talked a little bit about in the prep call.
Jamal Hamilton05:00.117
You to me.
Jolie Shapiro05:27.627
about what's going on if you wouldn't mind sharing. know you wanted to talk about it today, so.
Jamal Hamilton05:33.902
Yeah, for sure. I didn't plan on talking about it, but I feel like, like I said, I think it'll add great context and also play back into the power of the importance of mental health, especially in very stressful situations. So last week was a little bit of doozy for me. Got laid off from my job on Monday. found out my son had strep throat on Tuesday. So trying to take care of him, also trying to deal with the like, fact that I just got laid off and like, what does that entail? Also my birthday was last week as well, although it didn't feel like it. And then on Saturdays when I got the call that my mother had to be rushed to the emergency room essentially because She had been having a fever for a few days and a lot of her lower abdominal pain and she really couldn't really figure out what's going on. know, typical, you know, she tried the doctor on herself. So, you know, typical WebMD answers and, you know, taking Tylenol, but it was a little bit beyond that. She ended up having a tear in her lower intestines. So basically a hole in her lower intestines. So she couldn't keep any food down. she wasn't even hungry, because she was having air. She had bubbles of air pockets in her intestines, which we found out came from her colon because she had a tiny hole in her colon. that was kind of pushing air through and making her very sick, like very, very sick. And so yeah, she needed emergency surgery, which no one likes to hear those words, you know, typically it's like, okay. Yeah, we'll schedule the surgery out. you know, next week or something like that. But it was very one of those, you we need to get her into surgery like ASAP because this is bad. All the while I had to drive back from Fredericksburg because I was trying to be on vacation last week as well while all these things were going on. had to literally like a bed out of hell, drive back to Houston, head straight to the ER to be with her. and then got transported to Memorial Hermann, the big hospital here. yeah, she went to surgery late Saturday night, I believe, and didn't get out until three o'clock that morning. Yeah, I'm extremely grateful because I think that situation could have been, it could have really got a lot worse. when she like the doctor said she came in when she needed to like it's who was like I'm glad that you came in when you did because many longer and there could have been some other complications as well. So honestly just really grateful for the doctor. She really gave her all and wanted to make sure that she was making the best decisions for my mom to make sure that she was getting good care and she'd be able to. live a normal life after this surgery because there was a possibility that she wouldn't be able to. So yeah, I think we just we just all rallied around her and just was extremely grateful that she was still here, that she got the help she needed then. She's not out of the woods yet. She still has to stay in the hospital for a few days to basically see if the patch holds and Make sure that there's no other complications or anything like that. So she's still there right now. I'll probably head there after this anyways, but Just a little small snippet into the kind of it's a kind of what I've been kind of dealing with the last week or so
Jolie Shapiro09:44.299
Wow, you're having quite the week.
Jamal Hamilton09:47.694
Yeah, I am definitely having quite the week. Yeah, that might be a better way to put it.
Jolie Shapiro09:51.458
In other words, holy fucking shit. Wow. Yeah, well, yeah, everyone, we all curse on this podcast. It's about mental health. So you know, we're like, we're just sailor males. Yeah, no, seriously, very, very sorry to hear that. But I'm glad she she's at least at least made it out of like the first phase. And there weren't any more complications.
Jamal Hamilton10:03.672
Thank you. Yeah, yeah, yeah, she's, yeah, for sure. So she's on the other side of it now. So now it's just the road to recovery.
Jolie Shapiro10:26.613
Yeah, yeah, I get that. I get that in my own way. My parents are going through some pretty tough stuff right now. If I say it, they'll kill me. I posted on LinkedIn and my mom was like, take that down. But like, she's like, not everyone needs to know that we're dying. I'm like, yeah, but I mean, it was a really nice moment.
Jamal Hamilton10:37.642
Thank Yeah, yeah, yeah, for sure. it's like, I do the same thing, right? I'm so open and vulnerable. I tend to take to LinkedIn as, you know, not in a way to try to bring attention to myself. It's literally therapy for me. Like posting on LinkedIn is literally therapy for me. It's a way to get my thoughts out of my head. And it's been extremely helpful. I posted about it the other day too. Obviously I didn't go into details about it. But yeah, so yeah, I posted about it and got so much love and support on it. Like people had no idea what I was even talking about. And I think that is the part that really stood out to me the most. Like people had no idea what I was going through. I just, you know, I kept it very vague, but It's the outpour, the outreach. mean, the DMs, the text messages I got from people like, hey, man, you're OK. I don't know what's going on, but send in love and prayers your way. That lets me know that there's just the power of showing up and being vulnerable and then opening yourself up is extremely powerful. It's so impactful to be able to do that. So that's why I can like post and stuff like that.
Jolie Shapiro12:13.803
Yeah, that's amazing. I remember I first saw your post and it it almost felt like a diary into your head. But like in a really, yeah, but in like a really,
Jamal Hamilton12:22.604
Yeah.
Jolie Shapiro12:28.097
polished way, which I found really interesting. And I think you really made a name for yourselves. But beyond that, I think you really help people with what you write about. I haven't signed up for your newsletter yet, but I you started a newsletter about mental health and I just think like just talking about it and what do they always say that corny saying bring your authentic self. But you actually do.
Jamal Hamilton12:44.387
down. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's so... Yeah, it's... And I hate the fact that... I hate the fact that true statements or true quotes are considered cliche now. And in my opinion, just because it's cliche doesn't make it not true. You know, it's became... It's cliche because it is so true. You know, it is so much that it resonates with other people. yeah, that's how I like to kind of think about it. And... Yeah, when I started this journey, really was a way. The way you put that was perfectly. I've never thought about it like that. That like, it's a diary into my mind. Because so much, so much of my life was not public. So much of my life, I didn't let my thoughts get out. You know, I didn't show I didn't show much of anything. I'm a very internal person. So I process things internally. quite a bit before I can even get to the point of sharing them with other people. But over the last, I would say the last maybe three to five years is when the shift happened. I would say when I first got into tech, but it was honestly a little bit before that when I started to really want to understand myself. I want to understand my insecurities. I want to understand my fears. I want to really look in the mirror and just face them head on and talk about them. You know, because it's when you talk about things, it shines a light on it. brings awareness to it. And it makes it real. You know what mean? If it lives in your a lot of times, if it lives in your head, it doesn't feel real. But when you actually like speak it out or you actually tell someone, it's now it's real. And it's so real that it's provided me so much relief, so much support. Yeah, and just a way for me to just. share what I've been through, but also share my experiences with other people. Even when you touched on that, it helps people. I didn't set out to really help people. I really set out to literally just vent. I literally set out just to kind of vent and just to kind of talk about the things I was going through, what I've experienced, the emotions that I was dealing with at the time, or even just my own struggles. My own struggles with anxiety, my own struggles with depression. and grief and loss and things like that. And yeah, so LinkedIn just became that outlet for me. And yeah, it's become a way for me to document my story. Whether that's personal story or professional story, it's really given me a way to document that. So I've got look back. on these things later on and actually see how far I came and see how open that I was. Because a lot of times I can fall back into these spaces where I kind of retreat back into myself. Or as my partner Amanda would say, she would say, it looks like old Jamal showed up today. And that's so powerful because sometimes old Jamal does. show up and he's very closed off. He doesn't know how to express his emotions. He doesn't know how to let people in. He just knows how to retreat and run away and escape and just numb himself. So it's been years of me trying to teach that little kid that it's okay to open up. It's okay to be vulnerable. It's okay to be honest with other people because when you're honest with other people, you're honest with yourself. So yeah.
Jolie Shapiro17:03.169
Yeah, I love that. That's... Your partner's really smart. I can see why you're with her. That's a great, I think it's a great way to put it. I can definitely relate. I was talking to another guest and I definitely... I'm afraid to feel.
Jamal Hamilton17:26.862
Thank Mm-hmm. Yeah.
Jolie Shapiro17:34.054
afraid to feel and I realized that my entire life I have been throwing myself into different insert addiction here to not feel and
Jamal Hamilton17:45.486
Mm-hmm.
Jolie Shapiro17:50.932
I only have two addictions, only right? Only two addictions. More than enough, I'm on my second program, so you know we're good. so the first was, I'm pretty open about this one. So the first was a 12 steps in AA. So I'll be sober for four years in December. Thank you, yeah.
Jamal Hamilton17:53.166
That too is, that's more than the no. Yeah. That's awesome, man. Congrats. Yeah.
Jolie Shapiro18:17.281
Yeah, it's a, I have a community. Actually, it's funny, I was about to totally cancel this community that I made and this one girl signs up and we go on this hike and she's like, I needed this. I needed to talk to you about what I was going through with my struggles with alcoholism. We walked for two hours talking about it and I was like, you know what? I don't know about the whole like coincidence versus, you know, forget what it is, nature versus not nature versus nurture, I'm forgetting the word, coincidence versus like meant to be, but it was pretty powerful. So back to the main point. I get that I totally go inside. I just don't.
Jamal Hamilton18:55.714
Yeah.
Jolie Shapiro19:09.045
do it in a healthy way. And I think a lot of people can relate to that. think like, I don't know about you, but I throw myself into, it'll be food, it'll be alcohol, it'll be exercising seven days a week, like anything to not.
Jamal Hamilton19:12.086
Yeah.
Jolie Shapiro19:26.066
feel or process what's going on. Like, I mean, again, my parents can kill me, but like, they're both they're both on the way out. Like my mom has terminal cancer, my dad has Parkinson's, you know, and it's
Jamal Hamilton19:35.819
Okay. Yeah.
Jolie Shapiro19:40.672
It's fucking hard. So when I started the eating disorder program, all I was doing was crying because you have you have no mask anymore. You don't have any you don't have anything guarding you. So you're just like, hope I never cut that out because I sounded like I was like a gremlin. But but yeah, that's just my two cents on it.
Jamal Hamilton20:04.206
Yeah, yeah, no, it's not you you sound a little bit like me you're I Have kind of cloned it like we're escape artists like escapism Was my thing still is sometimes I'm the king of escaping. I don't want to deal with it. I don't want to talk about it So yeah, I'm out like I'm out of here whether that's physically leaving or whether that's mentally leaving and just checking out. Like for me, it started out as, you know, just, it doesn't sound that bad, right? It's just doom scrolling. You know what I mean? Just watching videos and just, you know, just literally just checking out, right? Until I find myself doing it all day. You know, I have to just zone out. I got to pick up my phone and watch a funny video or or binge watch a series or something like that. And again, it doesn't sound that bad, right? But in the grand scheme of when I like truly think about it, I'm just like, I am running from something right now. Like I'm trying to escape into this tiny little screen because I don't want to deal with all of the stuff around me. And you got to be very aware. Like I think it's important. You have to be aware what your triggers are. but you also have to be aware of what your vices are and you know, the ways that you try to escape so that you can catch them early on. Right. For me, it's like, if I find myself picking up my phone way too much, then I'm like, all right, I'm trying to escape from something and maybe I should just pick this. Maybe I should put my phone down and pick up this thing that I'm trying to escape from. and just, just tackle it. Just, you know, just run straight. freaking through it. Because a lot of times it's not it's I've been right, I can only speak for myself. I know a lot of times the thing that I'm running from isn't really that big. You know, and like in the grand scheme, I think it's really not that big, but it's it feels big in my mind. Only because I keep trying to avoid it. So the more you avoid it, the bigger it feels in your head. So I'm like, all right, man, just stop, stop, stop running from this thing. Like, what is this thing? Like name it. Okay, cool. This is the thing that you're trying to escape from. Why are you trying to escape from that? Like what's causing this? And then once I really kind of peel back those layers, or peel back the onion, I'm just like, it really is not that deep, man. Like, you know what mean? Like what you're running from is in that deep. Obviously what I just spoke about earlier with my, like what my mom and the weed that I've had, it's really easy for me to. escape right now. I mean, it would be justified, right? You know, something like, yeah, man, you're going through a lot, like, okay, if you want to binge watch Netflix, man, like, do it, like, you deserve that. You know what mean? But I have to be conscious because it's a very slippery slope. For me, it's a very slippery slope, I can find myself escaping for weeks, months at a time. And if I If I can't pull myself out, I have to tap someone to pull me out of that. And a lot of times that is my partner, Amanda, like she will pull me out of that because she, we're so close in the day to day that I can't escape in front of her because she knows, like she just knows, she knows when I'm retreating into myself, she knows when I'm a little bit more reserved and quiet that something's wrong, like something's going on. And She will ask me a question. Well, we have a list of questions, like prompts that we ask each other when we are both dealing with something very stressful. And we just aren't in a position to communicate that. So we have a list of questions designed to ask each other to get to the root of whatever the thing is that we're trying to get away from or escape from. And it's been probably one of the biggest game changers for not just our relationship but for each other. Because sometimes you don't know the questions to ask yourself. I could sit here and think all day. Sometimes I just don't know. I don't know the questions to ask myself. I might not even be in the space to want to ask myself those questions. But when someone else, like an outside party, can come in and have an outside perspective and ask you the question, then I could be like, huh. Okay, well, I didn't think about that, but you might be right. Or like, oh, wow. Okay, yeah, you are right. I am trying to escape from this thing. I have been picking up my phone more. I have been, you know, retreating in my office a little bit more, or I have been more distant. So sometimes you just need a little nudge, you a little help from someone, you know, you need a prompt or something to kind of help, you know, kickstart the awareness. Yeah.
Jolie Shapiro25:16.373
That's amazing. It sounds like you've got it down on how to bring yourself back.
Jamal Hamilton25:23.662
I definitely would say I do now. it's been... Yeah, that wasn't always the case, for sure. It wasn't always the case. It used to take me months, sometimes years, to kind of pull myself out of it. And I talk about it all the time now. my partner Amanda, she's always just like, I'm in awe of how resilient you are and how you're able to kind of power through things and how you're able to have just a really light and good perspective on things. And yeah, that's like a long time to cultivate. That's a, it's like a really long time to cultivate. So I always say like, my speed to My speed to awareness and recovery has reduced drastically than it was a few years ago. It would take me months to kind of pull myself out. Now, mean, at most a week. There's nearly not like at most a week. I'm just like, all right, bro. Enough is enough. What is this thing we're running from? You need to tackle it right now so that we can continue to move forward. Which reminds me of one of my favorite quotes and Everybody can feel how they want about this guy You know say I like him at times. I don't agree with a lot of stuff he says but I don't do you Alex from hormones II
Jolie Shapiro27:01.983
No, I don't.
Jamal Hamilton27:02.766
Yeah, I asked for Mosi. He's like a big, he's a big sales guru guy and he talks about, you know, how he scaled his business from, you know, zero to a million times in time again. just, um, yeah, he's really powerful at building businesses and kind of just like teaching a certain mentality around business. Um, but I was into a podcast of his one day, maybe two years ago and He said something that literally stuck with me and I say it every single day now and he said, action alleviates anxiety. And I literally, I had to pause the podcast and like rewind it and listen to that again. And it was like the biggest light bulb that went off in my head as if like that was the missing piece. Like my whole life, that was the missing piece because I've dealt with anxiety my whole life. I'm very anxious person when it comes to past. present future, you know, things that I don't have control over, they're just the uncertainty. And I realized in that moment, was like, bro, this is the fucking truest statement I've ever heard in my life. Like when I really pulled, like when I really kind of like, went and thought about all of the things that were causing me so much anxiety. And I was like, if you take action on these things, that would immediately alleviate it. It'll remove that from your mind. It'll take the stress off your brain. Like you'll feel better. Like then it's just been a game changer. Like it's literally been a game changer. Anytime I feel anxiety around something, I pinpoint what it is. And I'm like, okay, what is the action that I can take on this that will help alleviate this? Like ASAP. Like literally ASAP. I'm just like, okay, what is the thing? Okay, this is the thing. Okay, what's the action that I need to take? Okay. And I'll take the action. And it just, yeah, man, it's been tremendously helpful for me in reducing my anxiety. Like I've been able to reduce it by so much, like cut it in half basically. I'm literally just taking action. And I guess twofold on that. like action alleviates anxiety, but also brings about clarity as well. Cause I'm okay now I'm less anxious about the thing because I took the action and now I have a certain clarity now around it. Like I'm like, okay, I can think clearly about this thing now. Now it's just been beautiful. That's one of my favorite quotes. I say it every day. It's, have it on my wall. I'll probably get a tattoo on my forehead or something, on something too. And yeah, yeah, it's, been, yeah, it's, it's, it's been extremely helpful. And, and terms of like anxiety and that stuckness feeling of feeling stuck. You know what mean? Because I'm like, whenever I feel stuck, it's usually because I need to take some sort of action. And either I'm refusing to take the action, I'm scared to take the action, or it just seems like overwhelming. Sometimes the action could be huge. It could be a big step. it could be the action could be leaving your job. And like that's huge. That's a huge freaking action that you would have to take. But you have to also understand, okay, this job is killing me. I'm burning out. I'm waking up in sweats. I'm anxious about even clocking in and say, yeah, okay. The action is to find a new job. That's the action. Like that's going to leave all the stuff that you're dealing with, but it's not going to make it easier to do. It's still a very hard thing to do. so I do want to preface that the action is going to be hard as fuck. to do, but once you do it... I would like to say it gets a little bit easier. I would like to say it gets a little bit easier just because I've been doing it for a while now, but I think it does. I think it does get easier to do. But it also builds confidence in yourself as well. It also makes you say like, okay, like I was brave. Like I'm actually a pretty brave and courageous person by taking this action. And that's how I look at it, right? Especially big things like losing your job or You know, having to be a caretaker for your mother, you know, all those things. And it's like, yeah, crap, this shit's gonna be hard, but I gotta do it. And I know when I do it, I'll feel a lot better afterwards.
Jolie Shapiro31:58.637
That's amazing. I think you framed it perfectly and gave the context around that quote. I thought you were gonna say Joe Rogan. I was like, mm.
Jamal Hamilton32:08.65
I love Joe too. I love Joe too. I got a couple other different quotes from Joe. He's a lot more controversial than Alex. I definitely would say.
Jolie Shapiro32:20.065
No, but yeah, for sure. But in all seriousness, I get that. I really, really get that. For me, it's been all about, so when I was 20, I got diagnosed with a mood disorder. over the years, I just kept getting these diagnoses thrown at me, thrown at me, thrown at me. I don't really think they're, I think they're all just features, to be honest. That's what I ended up figuring out. Is that my mom calls it Independence Day, like with the big ship and all the little saucers. That's essentially how my mood disorder works.
Jamal Hamilton32:46.51
you Yeah
Jolie Shapiro32:58.357
but it really teaches you resilience. for like yourself, like what I asked myself when I got a quote unquote label, I'm like, okay, what's the best next step? Well, probably need to talk to a doctor. Or I need to, you know, you know, I realized I was, I never really treated this eating disorder. So what's the best next step? Let me look up eating.
Jamal Hamilton33:08.75
Mm-hmm.
Jolie Shapiro33:26.689
in intensive outpatient programs for eating disorders and finally get it fixed. had it my whole life. Like what's the next, and it doesn't always have to be that intense, but like I'm feeling kind of down today. Maybe I should go outside. Simple as that.
Jamal Hamilton33:35.958
Yeah, yeah, yeah, for sure. Maybe I should go for a walk. Maybe I should call a friend I haven't talked to in a while. You're right, it doesn't need to be that deep. Like I said, think we make it deep. We make it so deep in our mind. And it's just this huge thing when it's as simple as picking up the phones and then the texts, stepping outside or... Or maybe just even asking somebody else, like, hey, like, what do you think? You know what I mean? Like, you know what saying? And that's not to say that you, have to take their advice, but it'll at least open up dialogue around it and give you a different perspective, you know? So, you know, just take the action, man. One foot in front the other, just take the action. And I think that's super important is... I say this a lot of times, like not putting the cart before the horse. So it's like, yeah, what's the action you need to take right now? Not the action that you need to do three months from now, because we're not there yet. We're not there yet. So it's like, focus on the action that you need to take today. And yeah, just do that, man. And once you do that, OK, what's the next action that I have to take? And you can break them down into like small actions, medium actions, big actions. Cause if you're someone like me, like, okay, that's a really big action. I'm not sure if I'm ready for that. Okay. Start with the little baby, the little baby actions that you can take and just kind of like, work your way up. And it, it's like, it, it just builds momentum. It builds momentum. And like for me, I want you to get momentum. It's easier to take the actions because you're like, I just did seven of them. Like this is just another one I have to do, you know, maybe it's a little bit more intense than the first ones, but it's just another thing that have to do and. You know, I'm ready to do it.
Jolie Shapiro35:44.467
Yeah, no, I love that. And sometimes it's just nicking your bed.
Jamal Hamilton35:49.346
Man. Yeah, that one. Yeah, that one is... Because if I walk out of the room and I turn back and I did not need a mic... Some reason this feels heavy right now, but I know I just need to do it. Like I know I just need to go and it's literally gonna take two minutes. Just go do it. And I'm like, all right, I go do it, I go make my bed. And I'm like, all right, Like that's the first win you get of the day is making your bed. Or maybe it's getting out of the bed is your first win of the day. And I read that somewhere, I don't know where I read it, but it was like,
Jolie Shapiro36:26.475
That's a good point.
Jamal Hamilton36:32.748
you know, get your quick wins as early as you can in the day. Like start your day with a win and don't diminish that win, you know, as if it's just making your bed. It's not just making your bed. Because some people physically can't. know, some people mentally just cannot do it for whatever reason it is. it's not something to just kind of gloss over like if I said, that's it, it gets to be celebrated. I got out of bed today. Fuck yes. Like, and I made my bed? Oh, come on, like let's go. And okay, I had breakfast? I got out of bed, made my bed, and I had breakfast? Like that's an easy quick three wins that you could use, like that's momentum to carry you throughout the rest of the day. It sounds silly because I thought it was silly at first too. It's like, bro, what does that got to do? Like, know what saying? But it's about the habit that's building in your mind. And sooner or later, it becomes really just natural. It becomes natural. Okay, cool. Wake up. Okay, cool. Make a beer. Okay, cool. Eat a bowl of cereal. You know what I'm It just becomes natural. It becomes a part of your routine. And I think from there, you can start adding like little other little things in there along the way. You know, maybe that's just literally leaving your office. Maybe that's just standing up. Maybe you've been sitting for six fucking hours at your desk and your win is like, okay, I stood up from my desk and I went outside. Like that's a win, man. You know what That's a win. And I don't think people should discount that. I think every little freaking win that you can get, count all of them so that like at the end of the day, you can go back and look at them. Like that's something I do. Like I will write down my wins throughout the day. And at the end of the day, like, my partner will come together and we'll be like, all right, like, what's your wins for today? And yes, I'm like, and I look at my list, got like 20 wins on here. You know what mean? Because sometimes at the end of the day, you feel like crap. Like you feel like you didn't get anything done. You felt like you were lazy. Maybe you felt like you weren't productive. Maybe you just felt like, ugh, this day didn't go as planned. That's what your mind says. But if you look at this, like, visual representation of your wins, like damn I actually did a lot today like I actually did a lot of stuff today that deserves praise like it deserves for me to be proud of myself so you know take your wins small as you can write them down at the of the day look out on them and be like shit I really did get some shit done today
Jolie Shapiro39:16.511
I am stealing that, just so you know. That's amazing.
Jamal Hamilton39:17.774
Yeah, no, I'll steal it, man, steal it, man. Like I said, sound simple, but shit goes a long way.
Jolie Shapiro39:25.995
Yeah, yeah, it's so interesting. I feel like people like us, I feel like we're very similar. Maybe I'm just spitballing here, I feel at least I'll speak from my perspective. So that's what you're supposed to do in program. From my perspective, it's really interesting. feel like a lot of...
Jamal Hamilton39:38.367
I think so.
Jolie Shapiro39:51.306
Not even people with mood disorders or anxiety, but we all see life through, not all of us, a lot of us see life through a negative stance. Like, what can I do better? How can I improve? How can I this? How can I that? And in reality, just being human is hard. So.
Jamal Hamilton39:59.534
Yeah Mm-hmm. Right?
Jolie Shapiro40:14.977
That dance where a lot of us have mental illness because we're trying to process our fucking brains.
Jamal Hamilton40:18.542
Just being a fucking human is hard. That's the truest statement ever. Just breathing. Just breathing is fucking hard.
Jolie Shapiro40:29.217
For some people it is. It's not all involuntary for everyone. I mean we're lucky. But this was great. I know we can find you on LinkedIn but would love to hear from your perspective where we can find you.
Jamal Hamilton40:31.938
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, you can you definitely can find me on LinkedIn. That is that is my soapbox. That is where I live, where my ideas live, where a lot of my content lives as well. Yeah, like I did just start a newsletter. What was it a month ago? I think now. I don't know. I don't keep count, but yeah, you can find you can subscribe to my newsletter, architect your mind. We have. I think it's beehive, architect, yeah, beehive, architect your mind. yeah, so some of these same conversations I talk about in my newsletter, some of the same type of posts that I post about in terms of like mental health and it's like emotional capacity and literally just trying to navigate life. You know what saying? And those are the things I kind of talk about. A lot of times I pull from personal experiences and personal stories for myself because I found that it. it's helpful for people to have a story to like tie things back to. So if you're looking for the science and if you're looking for a bunch of percentages and numbers and stuff like that, that might not be the newsletter for you. But if you're literally just looking to read some shit that says, okay, I'm not alone in this. not the only person feeling this. I'm not the only person who's gone through this. And I give looking for a few actionable little tips and steps that have helped me, then that's the place for you. So yeah, and I appreciate every subscriber that I get. Again, for me, like I don't really know what the end goal is with the Deuce Letter, but I do know what the end goal is for me in general, and that is to help people anyway I can. That's to be a voice, you know, to be a light, to be support, to be the person someone looked to and says, okay, shit, man, if Jamal is going through that, like, it's okay. You know what mean? I'm not alone in how I feel about these things. So, yeah, man, that's all I've ever wanted is just to help people and share my experiences with them and have them share their experiences back with me too. Anytime you want to comment on my post, if you just want to hit me with a DM and just... I get DMs all the time from people and that is so meaningful to me when somebody DMs me and just like, you're posted, amen. You don't understand how much heard and felt and seen or your newsletter today has been my gospel, bro. You have no idea how much that resonated with me. That means so much to me. I guess I'm not in this for the metrics or the followers of the counts and yada yada yada, man. I'm in this just to help people. And if I only help one person, that's enough for me. That's enough for me and that's to let me know that I've made an impact on someone's life.
Jolie Shapiro43:46.881
I'll curse again. That is pretty fucking cool. I got a hop. uh, one sec. So this was awesome. Thank you so much Jamal.
Jamal Hamilton43:48.11
Yeah, no, no. No, thank you so much for inviting me. It's been great. I appreciate you so much, Joey.